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Old 27th September 2010, 07:14 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Cherishing Grandparents.

Today, in the lunar calendar, is 20th of the 8th month. It is also, the exact date my grandfather died a year ago. I do not pretend that I had deep relationships with him. But I thought that I should do something, a tribute to him.

My mother, has always said that he was a good person and I really regret not spending time with him. Back then, I was just another annoying kid who neglects their parents. Back in the 1970s, he was very rich, and shared his wealth with his family. Cars was his passion. The first thing he would do when he got a new car was to drive his wife and children out for a good meal. Sometimes, he would buy supper home after work and wake his kids to enjoy it with him.

He was kind-hearted. Despite knowing that he would make loss from business deals, he will still pretend that he did not know anything. When questioned, he said that other's had families to support too, so he would let them earn those money - despite the dishonesty. The peak of his career ended with him moving from landed property to HDB flat. My grandmother and grandfather used to call each other 'aunty' and 'uncle' which was so cute.
Then, he did enjoy his share of golden years, going around with other uncles, chatting over coffee cups in the void deck, taking buses to buy good food and looking at his grandchildren hop around the HDB.

Then, cancer struck him, he was ill for a long period of time, I do not even remember how long it lasted, months? or almost a year? Although I do not live with him, but I visited him at home every week and slowly witnessed how his health fell. I remembered the look in my aunt and mother's faces when he couldn't remember who they were. And how he could not talk, and how glad i was that above that, he remembered me although we were not close.

Mostly, it ached me to see how devastated my grandmother slowly became. I really love my grandmother, and she was the only grandmother i had left. Then, there came this month, where everyone in the family knew his time was almost up. I still remembered how I was saw the sms from my mother when I was in school during lunch break while walking back to the classroom. It said, 'Grandpa passed away. Come to ah mah's house after school.' His last words were to his most doted grandson, 'Ah boy ah, 吃飯了沒有?‘(have you eaten?) who was not present. He did attend his wake, but was unable to send him off his last journey as he had N level exams during the day of cremation. He left this world in his home, losing a battle to cancer. It went from his lungs to his brain. I remembered how my grandmother, due to hokkien traditions, could not send him off to cremation. And there were a few occasions that my grandmother was so upset, and cried till she almost passed out.

On top of that, just one week before my grandfather passed away, my grandmother's mother, died of cancer as well. Yes, my great grandmother and my grandfather both fought cancer during the same period of time. Then I realised, my grandmother had lost the two most important things in a women's life - her mother and her husband. However, I also had in mind that We, her children, are still here and will be the few motivations left for her. She said, crying, to my grandfather's corpse, 'Now that you both are gone, I am next.'

From then on, I swore to take good care of this grandmother, and when I am of age to get a driving license, I would immediately get one, let her live a comfortable life and never see her suffer again. She had suffered enough, hasn't she?

The older generations, always followed the lunar calendar when it comes to important dates. The lunar calendar, 20th of the 8th month, also happened to be my grandmother's lunar birthday. Happy Birthday, grandma.

(grandma then jokingly blamed my grandpa for dying on her birthday, saying that he knew she was a forgetful one, so she would be reminded of him every birthday.)

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Old 27th September 2010, 07:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Cherishing Grandparents.

Happy birthday to your grandma!

I am touched with your message. Thanks for sharing. =)

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Old 19th October 2010, 11:56 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Cherishing Grandparents.

That's sweet!

My grandfather's stuck with severe dementia, so although he's still around, it's too late for me to show my appreciation. So for me the lesson is to always cherish your grandparents and show your appreciation.

*Yeah I'm aware that this thread is more than 23 days old but I guess threads acknowledging the elderly never get old, huh.


Last edited by Eugenechia1989; 20th October 2010 at 12:00 AM.
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