Family Violence - Singapore Forums by SGClub.com
Singapore Forums by SGClub.com
Sitemap Contact Us FAQ Singapore Forums by SGClub.com
Home Photos Member List Register Mark Forums Read  
Go Back Home > Lifestyle > Love & Relationships > Family Matters » Family Violence

Why aren't you a member of SGClub.com yet??

» Join 130,000+ other members in chatting.
» Make lots of new friends here.
» Keep up-to-date with current events.
» Participate in Club outings.
» Download lots of Free Stuff!

Registration just takes 2mins and is absolutely free so join our community today!

I Want to Choose my Own Personal Nickname Now!


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 23rd May 2009, 12:14 AM   #1 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
NeoNerol is on a distinguished road

 
NeoNerol's Avatar
 
Posts: 274
Join Date: Sep 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Family Violence

Here's the incident...
My sister, 2 year old, started watching drama show. just a minute ago someone switch the television to a news channel. So she, as a 2 year old started whinning in extreme high pitch and throw tamtrum around holding the remote control. And since such attitude from a kid, we ignored it. So she carry on for few minutes. Suddenly my dad snatch the remote control from her hand and throw it hard to the wall. such action frighten her and she ran to mummy immediately. Alerted by the loud sound of the remote control to the wall, i came out to the living and began searching for the battery and control with my brother to check that it is still working fine because its a control that comes together with the starhub modern. Thanks god that it is still function. Placing the control back in place i state "can don't throw the control like that anot? if spoil already will be so inconvenient." than he turn agitated so i started reasoning with him, then he say stuff like "i got respect for him anot? talking back like this, after all i earn money feed u all...you only concentrate on your studies that's all, don't chap into my business..." (of cos i shoot back his words, Do i still have to take on a part time job if he is giving enuff?) DUHH!! He is just a cook and how much he only brings home a month? and speaks that with arrogants. As out reasoning when on, he started violence on me, grabbing my hand so tight and pull my hair wanting to throw me out of the house. I did not retaliate,i did not hit him back but keep pushing him away telling him "pa, i didn't touch you leh...pa, i didn't hit u leh..." My mother started talking and he let me go. Me and mum continued to talk sense into his thick skull. Finally, he lost the quarrel to the both of us then fell silent, stood there and show that face like its nothing...

I have not been finding him a burden, look down on him or anything. But with such a dad, what should i do when such things happen? how can i rest my mind when i'm at school or anywhere not at home when my families are alone with him? I'm the eldest son in the family, if i can't stop him and who will? I don't see how i was wrong when this happens.

Sponsors:
__________________
NeoNerol is offline  
Add to NeoNerol's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 23rd May 2009, 03:22 PM   #2 (permalink)
Experienced SGClubber
sky99 is a glorious beacon of lightsky99 is a glorious beacon of lightsky99 is a glorious beacon of light

 
sky99's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,466
Join Date: Nov 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 8 Times in 6 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Originally Posted by NeoNerol View Post
Here's the incident...
My sister, 2 year old, started watching drama show. just a minute ago someone switch the television to a news channel. So she, as a 2 year old started whinning in extreme high pitch and throw tamtrum around holding the remote control. And since such attitude from a kid, we ignored it. So she carry on for few minutes. Suddenly my dad snatch the remote control from her hand and throw it hard to the wall. such action frighten her and she ran to mummy immediately. Alerted by the loud sound of the remote control to the wall, i came out to the living and began searching for the battery and control with my brother to check that it is still working fine because its a control that comes together with the starhub modern. Thanks god that it is still function. Placing the control back in place i state "can don't throw the control like that anot? if spoil already will be so inconvenient." than he turn agitated so i started reasoning with him, then he say stuff like "i got respect for him anot? talking back like this, after all i earn money feed u all...you only concentrate on your studies that's all, don't chap into my business..." (of cos i shoot back his words, Do i still have to take on a part time job if he is giving enuff?) DUHH!! He is just a cook and how much he only brings home a month? and speaks that with arrogants. As out reasoning when on, he started violence on me, grabbing my hand so tight and pull my hair wanting to throw me out of the house. I did not retaliate,i did not hit him back but keep pushing him away telling him "pa, i didn't touch you leh...pa, i didn't hit u leh..." My mother started talking and he let me go. Me and mum continued to talk sense into his thick skull. Finally, he lost the quarrel to the both of us then fell silent, stood there and show that face like its nothing...

I have not been finding him a burden, look down on him or anything. But with such a dad, what should i do when such things happen? how can i rest my mind when i'm at school or anywhere not at home when my families are alone with him? I'm the eldest son in the family, if i can't stop him and who will? I don't see how i was wrong when this happens.
May i know how old are you ?

last time my dad cane me until my leg is bleeding and i was just in pri sch that time.

sky99 is offline   Add to sky99's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 23rd May 2009, 05:52 PM   #3 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
NeoNerol is on a distinguished road

 
NeoNerol's Avatar
 
Posts: 274
Join Date: Sep 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

i'm turning 19 this year and of cause for my age cane is nth already mah.

__________________
NeoNerol is offline   Add to NeoNerol's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 26th May 2009, 10:49 AM   #4 (permalink)
เพื่อนสนิท
Peuan Sanit has much to be proud ofPeuan Sanit has much to be proud ofPeuan Sanit has much to be proud ofPeuan Sanit has much to be proud ofPeuan Sanit has much to be proud ofPeuan Sanit has much to be proud ofPeuan Sanit has much to be proud of

 
Peuan Sanit's Avatar
 
Posts: 24,178
Join Date: Jun 2007
Likes: 91
Liked 112 Times in 86 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Originally Posted by NeoNerol View Post
He is just a cook and how much he only brings home a month? and speaks that with arrogants.
Firstly, there is no denying that he is your father. Secondly, regardless of his proffession, he still brought home the bacon and bread to feed you. Thirdly, he had put you thru school.

I presumed that you have another 2 siblings.....do you know how expensive it is to raise a child, let alone 3 kids?

Your father might be having a bad patch in his life right now or perhaps is suffering from work related stress.

Do you know how irritating that after a hard day's work, he comes home and the household is messy and noisy? your kid sister crying was the last spark and had erupted the volcano in him that was waiting to erupt.

Regardless what, he should not have raise his hands on you but as a son, you should also try to understand his situations. he might be worry with all the retrenchments going on in this bad ecomonical situations. He might be worry how to pay the monthly bills, etc.

Be patience and be understanding.

Blood is always thicker than water and there is no love like the love of a family.

__________________
Chan Mai Jai Dee Leaw
Peuan Sanit is offline   Add to Peuan Sanit's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 26th May 2009, 11:53 AM   #5 (permalink)
Experienced SGClubber
jewlreya has a spectacular aura about


 
jewlreya's Avatar
 
Posts: 7,351
Join Date: Sep 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 3 Times in 3 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Actually, I think you are pretty rude to your father. You are already 19, and you hold a part-time job, you should know how hard it is to earn money. Let alone, have you considered the rest of the bills that you father has to pay?

HDB monthly installment, SCV, phone bills, unit number monthly bill, etc. Perhaps you can take some time off and start reading all the monthly bills and see how much it can total up to. That's how my heart goes out all for my dad who is still working at 50+ (near 60) to support my brother and my education. My brother and I offered to work to pay for our personal bills (phone bills, internet), cos our dad doesn't use these services but he has been paying for us without any complaints.

Can you imagine how hurtful your father would have felt after your mother (someone he loved) and you got together and started rebutting him?

__________________
Apparels @ $15 [BLOG] On SGC Twitter Poodle Fan Club

*Have fun in SGClub but pls READ the RULES, Report Bad Posts and Give Reputation to Good Ones!*

Last edited by jewlreya; 26th May 2009 at 11:55 AM.
jewlreya is offline   Add to jewlreya's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 30th May 2009, 11:56 AM   #6 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
linger-ing is on a distinguished road

 
Posts: 106
Join Date: Jan 2009
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

i can only say tat the dad has a bad temper... low tolerance over some stuff? it will be no time tat the dad anger will be on the small little ger...

linger-ing is offline   Add to linger-ing's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 5th June 2009, 05:20 PM   #7 (permalink)
Addicted SGClubber
stevenchan is on a distinguished road

 
stevenchan's Avatar
 
Posts: 793
Join Date: May 2009
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

I think that your dad has bad temper... and some stress too.. try to talk with him and ask what is you problems... be openness with the family...

__________________
Click here!!! To find a Gifts and Souvenirs

My blog http://www.poetsdesign.blogspot.com
stevenchan is offline   Add to stevenchan's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 7th June 2009, 05:05 PM   #8 (permalink)
Experienced SGClubber
MukGu is on a distinguished road

 
MukGu's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,120
Join Date: Nov 2007
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

I believe your father is also very depressed that he isn't able to provide all you want.
He blames himself.
And imagine all the stress he faces at work, and the way you spoke to him, it'll make him feel very inferior.

Its not like he doesnt want to earn more money, right?

MukGu is offline   Add to MukGu's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 12:19 AM   #9 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
grilledcrab is on a distinguished road

 
grilledcrab's Avatar
 
Posts: 258
Join Date: Jan 2009
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Leave him alone, let things cool down between you both... Sometimes...absence makes the heart grow fonder of absence. I have been through this as well and have grown to appreciate that taking the backseat will still bring you to your intended destination. Now your dad is the one driving the car so just keep quiet and look on. : ) things will get better when you start to realise that your dad is really important to you when its your turn to take the wheel. Its not easy, but yea. :s what to do. lol.

__________________
all hail the hamster king
grilledcrab is offline   Add to grilledcrab's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 12:23 AM   #10 (permalink)
Legendary SGClubber
Fated is just really niceFated is just really niceFated is just really nice

 
Fated's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,009
Join Date: Dec 2008
Likes: 84
Liked 118 Times in 92 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Originally Posted by Peuan Sanit View Post
Firstly, there is no denying that he is your father. Secondly, regardless of his proffession, he still brought home the bacon and bread to feed you. Thirdly, he had put you thru school.

I presumed that you have another 2 siblings.....do you know how expensive it is to raise a child, let alone 3 kids?

Your father might be having a bad patch in his life right now or perhaps is suffering from work related stress.

Do you know how irritating that after a hard day's work, he comes home and the household is messy and noisy? your kid sister crying was the last spark and had erupted the volcano in him that was waiting to erupt.

Regardless what, he should not have raise his hands on you but as a son, you should also try to understand his situations. he might be worry with all the retrenchments going on in this bad ecomonical situations. He might be worry how to pay the monthly bills, etc.

Be patience and be understanding.

Blood is always thicker than water and there is no love like the love of a family.
I agree with you.
I think the "He is just a cook and how much he only brings home a month?"
That line quite hurting.
I mean if your dad work so hard then he hear that sure heart-broken.
Sorry don't mean to offend you in anyway.
Just wanting to state my opinion.
No grudge dude?

__________________

A dancing Pikachu, your argument is invalid.
Fated is offline   Add to Fated's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 12:28 AM   #11 (permalink)
Addicted SGClubber
grace317 will become famous soon enough

 
Posts: 623
Join Date: Nov 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Lol isn't this quite common..

__________________
where can we run to to escape ourselves?
grace317 is offline   Add to grace317's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 01:23 AM   #12 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
NeoNerol is on a distinguished road

 
NeoNerol's Avatar
 
Posts: 274
Join Date: Sep 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Originally Posted by jewlreya View Post
Can you imagine how hurtful your father would have felt after your mother (someone he loved) and you got together and started rebutting him?
actually i'm doubting that... he is as good as never speak to my mum before..


Originally Posted by stevenchan View Post
I think that your dad has bad temper... and some stress too.. try to talk with him and ask what is you problems... be openness with the family...
The thing is...he never talks about his problems no matter how much my mother had tried. like autistic? he is like left out in the family because he never shows any interest..

Originally Posted by MukGu View Post
I believe your father is also very depressed that he isn't able to provide all you want.
He blames himself.
And imagine all the stress he faces at work, and the way you spoke to him, it'll make him feel very inferior.

Its not like he doesnt want to earn more money, right?
maybe... but he thinks only to strike 4D and toto. =.=
and he spend money like water... $20 - $50 a day on it... like won't feel heart pain one.
mums says that it is his hobby, like when i like to play games.
so i never argue about it before to him.
like releasing stress in his hobby. i'm fortunate enuff that he doesn't drink.

Originally Posted by grilledcrab View Post
Leave him alone, let things cool down between you both... Sometimes...absence makes the heart grow fonder of absence. I have been through this as well and have grown to appreciate that taking the backseat will still bring you to your intended destination. Now your dad is the one driving the car so just keep quiet and look on. : ) things will get better when you start to realise that your dad is really important to you when its your turn to take the wheel. Its not easy, but yea. :s what to do. lol.
HE is like the solo type so taking the backseat is like will only bring me to the destination he intended. so many years with him, i never felt that he ever actually spared any thought for me before. And come to think of it, he had never played any part in disciplining me. wrong only cane...anything also cane with that aggresive look that i can never forget. right or wrong also cane 1st then cannot talk one. cane like i was never a living thing. is he really taking the wheel? or mum? mum feels more like the one more important to me...comparison is taking place here against his favour.

Originally Posted by Fated View Post
I agree with you.
I think the "He is just a cook and how much he only brings home a month?"
That line quite hurting.
I mean if your dad work so hard then he hear that sure heart-broken.
Sorry don't mean to offend you in anyway.
Just wanting to state my opinion.
No grudge dude?
nope, u didn't fren.. we speak about this cook topic before. i was like naive back then(still a kiddo)). i asked him, "y not be that kind of chef those wears white uniform one? u will earn more." guess what is his reply?... "aiyo sot de...wear uniform hot leh".==





Every single opinion and mind set that i have about him, none were positive. he is not someone whom i just knew for few days or weeks to judge that. i've lived with him for 19 yrs and i can't come out with anything positive. he can even blame mother that is she who wants my sister to be born not him, none of his business. WTFFF? where is ur responsibility? even my replies couldn't be any positive at all.

last time, there was a sign of improvment. finally a bright side... he LEARNS!
my sister is naughty again, this time he used the cane PROPERLY. that's fine. i was looking from the bedroom.

__________________
NeoNerol is offline   Add to NeoNerol's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 01:41 AM   #13 (permalink)
Experienced SGClubber
sky99 is a glorious beacon of lightsky99 is a glorious beacon of lightsky99 is a glorious beacon of light

 
sky99's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,466
Join Date: Nov 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 8 Times in 6 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

If you think he's too much

Dial 999

__________________


[Official]SGC Left 4 Dead 2 Thread -> http://forums.sgclub.com/singapore/o..._a_303841.html
sky99 is offline   Add to sky99's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 01:49 AM   #14 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
NeoNerol is on a distinguished road

 
NeoNerol's Avatar
 
Posts: 274
Join Date: Sep 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Originally Posted by sky99 View Post
If you think he's too much

Dial 999
i gotta have a good reason for tat. besides, mum would kill me!
anyway its still family matter. definitely try to take it into our own hands unless its outta control.

And...call police to cuff my dad? what kind of son would that make me?

__________________
NeoNerol is offline   Add to NeoNerol's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 01:51 AM   #15 (permalink)
Addicted SGClubber
Wayne is on a distinguished road

 
Wayne's Avatar
 
Posts: 758
Join Date: Dec 2007
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Asian (eastern) family barely communicate well, as adults feel that they R THE 1. do agree yr dad may juz had bad temper & stress. try yr might to put up with him. Protect yr family, dude.

Wayne is offline   Add to Wayne's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 01:25 PM   #16 (permalink)
Experienced SGClubber
StormxX is on a distinguished road

 
StormxX's Avatar
 
Posts: 3,221
Join Date: Sep 2007
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Bro, u got quite the same problem as me, but mine not that bad.

StormxX is offline   Add to StormxX's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 01:31 PM   #17 (permalink)
Experienced SGClubber
chowychow is a glorious beacon of lightchowychow is a glorious beacon of lightchowychow is a glorious beacon of light

 
chowychow's Avatar
 
Posts: 14,649
Join Date: Oct 2008
Likes: 1
Liked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Keep talking to your dad. But if he uses force on you and your mum still agrees to it then you should take the matter into your hands

__________________


+ Rep If You Like My Post
Men's best successes come after their disappointments-Henry Ward Beecher
The future depends on what we do in the present.-Mahatma Gandhi
chowychow is offline   Add to chowychow's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 17th June 2009, 04:02 PM   #18 (permalink)
Experienced SGClubber
sky99 is a glorious beacon of lightsky99 is a glorious beacon of lightsky99 is a glorious beacon of light

 
sky99's Avatar
 
Posts: 10,466
Join Date: Nov 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 8 Times in 6 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Originally Posted by NeoNerol View Post
i gotta have a good reason for tat. besides, mum would kill me!
anyway its still family matter. definitely try to take it into our own hands unless its outta control.

And...call police to cuff my dad? what kind of son would that make me?
Good reason?

ur thread title already give you the answer

Family Violence

__________________


[Official]SGC Left 4 Dead 2 Thread -> http://forums.sgclub.com/singapore/o..._a_303841.html
sky99 is offline   Add to sky99's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 18th June 2009, 01:24 AM   #19 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
NeoNerol is on a distinguished road

 
NeoNerol's Avatar
 
Posts: 274
Join Date: Sep 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

Originally Posted by NeoNerol View Post
i gotta have a good reason for tat. besides, mum would kill me!
anyway its still family matter. definitely try to take it into our own hands unless its outta control.

And...call police to cuff my dad? what kind of son would that make me?
thread title ish toking about this incident that took place, what happened in this incident that i wish to pay attention to. not a good reason to get my dad cuffed.

and good reasons refers to if things happen outta hand.

__________________
NeoNerol is offline   Add to NeoNerol's Reputation Reply With Quote
Old 29th June 2009, 03:39 PM   #20 (permalink)
Cool SGClubber
NeoNerol is on a distinguished road

 
NeoNerol's Avatar
 
Posts: 274
Join Date: Sep 2008
Likes: 0
Liked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Gender:

Re: Family Violence

tries to hit me with a chair on saturday....
2nd time he tried to use violence on me.

__________________
NeoNerol is offline   Add to NeoNerol's Reputation Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
family, violence

Thread Tools
Display Modes


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Violence in Sim Lim Square, unit # 02-76 gerardmauro Computers & Electronics 248 9th July 2009 09:32 AM
The violence of the teacher utahjazz SGClub Cafe 1 18th September 2008 07:04 PM
One in two believes family violence is a private affair Miss QQ International & Singapore News 4 29th November 2007 08:19 AM
Why this cycle of violence? janice International & Singapore News 2 11th July 2007 10:34 AM
ever use VIOLENCE on TEACHER? queenie School Life 21 23rd May 2007 06:24 PM

» Sponsors
Watch Free Movies Online
Celebrity Gossip
Food Delivery

» Facebook Fans
» What's Going On?
Title, Username, & Date
[Hard Truth] 69.9% of Singaporeans are more stupid than dogs and monkeys.
[Poor Health] Karma strikes ex-Health Minister Khaw Boon Wan hard.
Hepatitis E infections surge in Singapore, virus found in raw pork liver: SGH
Christianity and Buddhism have more in common than differences: (moderation and restr
[SG] Wants higher birth rate, but unwilling to fund treatment for childhood mental pr
E-scooter rider going at 28km/h at void deck injures man’s leg, gets 6 weeks’ jail
PMD users warned: Behave responsibly or face total ban
Supplier iPassion fined for putting SAFETY marks on unregistered PMD charging adaptors
SFA recalls US brand of flour over possible bacteria contamination
Female infant and male occupant sent to hospital after PMD-related fire in Bukit Batok...
Repost comment.
Top income brackets should be taxed at 99%.
Do you know?
480GB Transcend ESD350C Portable SSD Review
SFA suspends import of quail eggs from Malaysian farm due to drug residues
King Arthur Flour product recalled due to potential presence of E. coli
FS (10Pieces) Apple iPhone 11/11 Pro/11 Pro Max(Website www.esellibuy.com)$6...
Inspirational Songs
Instead of increase GST, what other more progressive wealth tax options (e.g. Replace
Elderly should be given free e-scooter try outs ASAP.
Featured Photos
by marisoljames322
· · ·
Member Galleries
20359 photos
13619 comments
by marisoljames322
· · ·
Member Galleries
20359 photos
13619 comments
by pdsubbu
· · ·
Member Galleries
20359 photos
13619 comments
by Vikas Dhar
· · ·
Photography
35 photos
36 comments
by aaudreygan
· · ·
Guy Photos
1581 photos
946 comments
by aaudreygan
· · ·
Girl Photos
4351 photos
28608 comments
by a8paris
· · ·
Guy Photos
1581 photos
946 comments
by a8paris
· · ·
Guy Photos
1581 photos
946 comments
by aaricia
· · ·
Girl Photos
4351 photos
28608 comments
by aaricia
· · ·
Girl Photos
4351 photos
28608 comments

 

All times are GMT +8. The time now is 10:43 PM.


Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright© 2004-2013 SGClub.com. All rights reserved.