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Old 18th June 2010, 01:40 AM   #1 (permalink)
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mummy i ♥ you

dear mummy,
today is not mother’s day, neither is it your birthday, or any other day that calls for a special celebration.
today is a day that i thought to myself, and realised how much you’ve aged.
how much the years of bringing us up have stolen away your beauty and youth.


today is a day i feel i have matured a little bit, just a little bit, because i am still a playful young kid at heart. and to you, i’m still a sheltered baby, not knowing about the dangers and conniving strangers of the outside world.


i was playing with my camera today and taking macro shots of you, while you spontaneously posed for them.



the gap between your 2 front teeth that you’ve always been conscious of,




the sesame seed that always finds a spot between your teeth,




the necklace and earstuds that you have worn since marriage,





the wrinkled skin on your hands,




the brown stains in your nails from grinding potatoes religiously every morning,




the 老花眼镜 you wear when you help 干妈 to watch the stocks on tv,




the white strands that are starting to dominate...




right from the start of marriage, you had a hard life. daddy went china for a whole year and you had to take care of month-old sis alone. no one came to help you, not even the in-laws, because they wanted a boy. and they being the old people with traditional and flawed mindsets, think that you’re the one at fault.


when i was brought to this world two years later, i was another disappointment to the in-laws for not having a dick.


six years down the road, an accident happened, and my annoying youngest sister was borned.


throughout the years, i have brought you much pain and heartaches. from shoplifting in primary 4, to attempting suicide in sec 4, playing truant in jc, getting drunk and taken advantage of during holiday jobs, still at loggerheads with dad, and now, even getting myself into a shitload of trouble in uni....


if i told you what else i had gone through, you would never ever ever have believed. you would be so shocked, and so disappointed with me, you would probably suffer a heart attack.


people say usually the middle child is the most rebellious, and i think i have to concur. my sisters are far different from me, and are much less illogical and irrational than i am. sometimes i just hate being myself, and i wish i could be them.


...


you were selfless; you always placed us, your three daughters, before yourself.
you carefully fished out the meat for us, while you took the bones and sucked at them.
i selfishly thought you were dirty from cooking in the kitchen and didn’t want you to lie on my bed.


mummy, you were always so health-conscious, wholemeal, brown rice, green bean soup, barley, chrysanthemum tea without sugar, dates, herbal soups, organic vegetables. you would brew anything and everything for the family, just to ensure our health.


i don’t know why but god chose to let cancer befall on you. three long, arduous years of battling with the last stage of colon cancer, and just when you have finally triumphed, the doctor says there’s something wrong with your lungs and it could be lung cancer.


i don’t want you to go mummy, i want you to live on strongly and healthily, for as long as we live. last month during grandaunt’s funeral, you cried, although our family isn’t that close to her. and sis and i cried because you cried, and we know why you cried. you were imagining things, you were imagining it happening to yourself, you were thinking ‘what if i died’...


dear mummy, i just wanna let you know that i love you, that every single thing you do, is truly being appreciated by us. even though you’re naggy at times, i understand its sheer concern for us. i wish you would let me hug you, and not say you're smelly and tell me to go away.


























once again, mummy i you.



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Last edited by lidatou; 18th June 2010 at 01:41 AM.
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Old 18th June 2010, 01:51 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: mummy i ♥ you

Good!
One of the few best I've seen in this forum.

TS, i support your this thread!
and I love my mum alot alot alot too!

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Old 18th June 2010, 02:22 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: mummy i ♥ you

damn you made me think of my late grandma..
now im on the verge of tears just before going to sleep.. zzz..

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Old 20th June 2010, 06:30 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Re: mummy i ♥ you

Ts. That was a beautiful post. My thoughts are with you. Your mom will be in my prayers tonight. I wish her the best of health. :-) Every mother is alike. No matter how old you are, in their eyes, you will forever be their baby.

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