Your significant other and your best friend(s)

**♥3♥** · 11-11-2009, 07:26 PM

Hello. Have a fast question here.
Often see cases where the gf or bf will end up falling for your best friend..
and if the best friend so shameless will accept him even w/o ur blessings.

But that's not what i'm asking today.

Want to know if your gf/bf does not get along well with your best friend or even a lot more people you know.. do you think the relationship still have a chance? I have seen a few relationships fail because the best friend was able to psycho until the significant other was dumped...without regrets!

What is your take on this issue? Please advise us. No opinion is too silly.

**coolet** · 11-11-2009, 07:59 PM

my clique ppl keep telling one of the girl that the bf is bad.. judging from wat we hear and see..

but they still tgt for more than 3 years plus..

**xiinn** · 11-11-2009, 08:00 PM

If the two bonds are strong, it'll last.
if not, nahs

**Stanstan** · 11-11-2009, 10:57 PM

Why judge your SO using your best friend's view, instead of your own view.

To me is, I often listen one friend and the other friend saying each other's negative points, but end of day. I just listen and nothing went into my mind. I believe I judge this person on my own & will never let other rumours or 'the friend's action' to a particular person affects my personal judgment towards him/her.

**FBI** · 12-11-2009, 12:43 AM

Like stan said she or he is your partner so don let others judge it. And don listen to peer pressure because most likely u 2 are gonna breakup due to that. If lets say they keep saying negative comments abt him or her.

**constanceling** · 12-11-2009, 03:09 PM

you are in love with your SO instead of ur best friend right?
best friends giving opinion is good,
but in the end you should be the one judging as you are the one that is walking thru with him..

**jasmineee.wq** · 12-11-2009, 03:36 PM

you know your SO better and deeper than your best friends do. (it should be the case)
so following wad your best friends said isnt a good option afterall, isnt it?
wad matters most is follow your heart?

**racerboi** · 12-11-2009, 04:21 PM

if you follow your best friends' pov, will you also follow your mum's? (if you are a guy)

my point here is, this r/s is between your SO and you. you can seek advice and they are merely for references only. you should decide base on what your SO and you have discussed.

**bLeuZ** · 12-11-2009, 05:42 PM

this reminds me when i was with my ex bf during poly..thinking back i realize that my classmates object to our relationship because honestly my ex has a huge attitude problem..but what they did for me, i appreciate it very much..they respected my decision and still regard me as frens, gave me constructive advices..never did they talk bad abt him to me...they let me make my own decisions...i think thats what real frens do for each other, maybe also becoz most of my classmates are older than me...

**♥3♥** · 20-11-2009, 11:36 AM

I see. Thanks for all the feedbacks.
Seems like i got too worried for nothing. (I'm a guy btw

)
Gf's best friend totally cant stand me, i'm quite troubled by this actually.
End up I cant go out with my gf all the time
because she needs to go out with her frens too.
Any suggestions how to solve this?

**falconer** · 20-11-2009, 11:43 AM

from experience.. had dated a girl and brought her to meet my friends and they were all against her.. had bad feelings about it. I felt the same way after a while and dumped her too hah.

**jasmineee.wq** · 20-11-2009, 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by falconer

from experience.. had dated a girl and brought her to meet my friends and they were all against her.. had bad feelings about it. I felt the same way after a while and dumped her too hah.

why were they against her?

like very poor thing leh, boyf's frens against her then got dumped..

**sky99** · 20-11-2009, 04:56 PM

I dont really have a good impression of 1 of my friend's GF.

But its still my friend choice what. As long as he like the girl. why bother what other ppl think?

**♥3♥** · 24-11-2009, 12:27 PM

I see. Okok thanks alot for the feedbacks!

**Zoberk** · 24-11-2009, 05:54 PM

There are two sides to this story.

First, let's say I am the person who has a gf that my friends disapprove of.
Now I seperate the people I meet into categories. Not everyone can be called a friend. The people I call friends are the ones I have shared many things with and passed through many filters, so those people are the ones that are important. The rest are just acquaintances and are of no importance to me.
When my friends realize something bad about either me or my gf, they will say it without hesitation. Likewise, I will consider what they have said, for I know they will mean no real harm, but I will not jump to conclusions. I will observe the situation to see if there is truth to what they are saying.

In relationships, I may be so infatuated that I may not see the things that my friends may easily recognize. This works the other way around as well, I will know my gf better than them and see if there is a misunderstanding or another reason behind all that is going on. Still, in the end it all comes down to me and whether or not the pros of the relationship outweigh the cons, for we all know that no relationship is perfect.

The second side, or point of view, is when a close friend of mine is dating someone I disapprove of. It is his or her choice in the end. I will let them know my opinion if they ask me my opinion, that way I will not look too nosy, and they will eventually ask me anyway. However, I will never insist, threathen, or get childish and moody in any way. I know that my friends will be able to balance the times we spend together. Should the girlfriend or boyfriend turn out to be really cruel and force them to stop talking to me, I will be on standby. A true friend may seem to abandon, but will never really abandon. The time will come when they will learn their mistakes, because they will suffer as a result of their choices, and what better way to learn than to experience it personally. Friendship is not supporting someone when they can stand, its supporting them when they are most likely to fall. Should the time come, I will be there to pick them up.

**cherie_1992** · 24-11-2009, 07:00 PM

they don't really know that person well.
and they heard everything from rumours and stuff
what for care about other people say just believe in what you see