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Old 4th January 2010, 06:53 PM   #1 (permalink)
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What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Ok, i have endured this for years and i think i should find an answer soon.

Let me start on my family background first,
My dad is a cabby, my mum is a admin worker for 25+ years, and my sis, a cabin crew.
My family's combined income is not so low to the point where we cant afford much things.
My parents dont quarel much, the last time they did was many months ago or what, but the problem is my mum.
My dad is the one who pays for groceries, food and my allowances. i dont expect much from him as he dont earn much as a cabby. He is also understanding and caring.
Well, that is not for my mum. I dont know if its work stress or not but i still think its wrong to vent her anger on us (me and my sis).
Ok, the problem with her is, she keeps demanding that me and my sis should do all the housework, and she nags at us for not doing housework everytime she comes back from work. Well, i know we should do housework as her children, but isnt it too much?
She seldom does anything. After we did not hire any maid, which was years back, my sis and i had to do everyting ourselfs. We have to sweep the floor, mop, and we have to do our own laundry. Even cooking was done by us. whats worse is, since my sis is working as a cabin crew now, she demands i do everything. And what does she do? Nothing except washing her own laundry (yes, she never washes our clothes for us, not even my dad's). And my sis has grown tired of her nagging and has been coming back late to avoid her nagging.
Apart from housework, my mum limits us and even threatens us in many ways.
She doesnt give me any money when i want to go out, and this has made me fed up and stopped going out with my friends altogether. You see, going out with friends and not having money to spend is like might as well dont go out. My weekly allowance is $30. Everyday in school, i would spend about 5 - 7 $ for recess plus lunch, and at the end of the week, i would have nothing left. Sometimes i would save some to buy things i want, like stationery or stuff. I never asked her for money when i wanted to buy something, because she would just scold me and told me not to spend money. I dont ask money from my dad as he is not earning much. I know we should not spend too much money and save, but isnt it too much?
She even threatens to cancel my broadband internet connection whenever we didnt do the housework. What the hell, seriously. I dont demand much, but this is just getting out of hand. Nowadays, i think there is not a day she would not nag at us.
When i asked her if she would buy a new computer, as mine was going to up lorry, she refused and say " Why should i buy for you?"
wow, that really made me angry, but never once i did scold her or anything. Though i admit sometimes i would talk back to hr when its too much for me to take.

I have also lead a boring life since primary 5 and she was the reason why i changed into a anti-social person.

This is part 1, i will continue part 2, describing my life since sec 1 or so, when i have the time.
For now, ill be off to dinner

PART 2:
Ok this is about my secondary school life.
When i first entered sec1, i thought that the life i was leading was normal like everyone else. But then, i have came to realise that that was otherwise. I was playful in sec1 and 2, visiting the discipline master was a common thing.
Results were bad too. My mum doesnt care about my school life, other then telling me why i did so badly for my exams and never understanding my problem. I wouldnt tell her when i achieved something good, as she wouldnt care much anyway. When i stopped going out with friends in sec 1, i got hooked on onlien games and started not going out with my parents too. So from then, i started staying at home all the time and not going out, liek what you would call, a no-lifer. Well, what can i do?
Sec3 was also the same, with even worse results cus i wouild sleep in class and not bother everytime. Still, my mum didnt bother other than scolding me for not doing well. Towards the end of the year, i told my self i should start living a new life, and i changed my attitude, mixing with friends more, and studying harder.
For sec4, my grades improved alot, and STILL, my mum says i did badly and compare me to my cousins all the time. Well, this hurt me alot, as it showed me that she does not even care about my efforts. I didnt let that affect me, as i know im carving my own life after all. So, i continued working hard, and my friends were all impressed how i changed. I started feelign better, though still, i dont go out with friends as i did not have cash to go out. I also learnt that most of my frens were given at least 50$ whenever they went out. Well, i shrugged it aside, since i am used to the "locking myself at home" type of life.
During the o levels, my mum didnt even encourage me. She even assumed that i didnt study for my Os. Well, i decided i shouldnt care about her anymore, and i worked very hard for my os.
When the Os came, i felt that all papers were a breeze, (I tookt he Os last year, still waiting ffor my resutls now). And now, im expecting good results and hoping that it would impress my mum abit and change her attitude towards me.

For now, im worried for my JC/Poly life. If i go to a poly, i wonder how am i going to survive, with the weekly allowance of 30$??? I doubt i can even buy my own clothes then.
Please, give me some advices, fellow friends.

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Old 4th January 2010, 07:40 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Tough life, sis. Go get a job or try to get your mom to understand your predicament a little. :d

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Old 4th January 2010, 07:44 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

well, you can ask your mum for more money, telling her that its not enough.
Or go get a job, earn your own money.
Or just be satisfied with what she gives, im also getting $30 per week, i dont spend much thou.
Clothes, get my mum to pay

well somehow my life almost the same like yours, i understand how you feel.
my mum loves to confiscate my hp and laptop.

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Last edited by Weztimonial; 4th January 2010 at 07:45 PM.
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Old 4th January 2010, 07:46 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

i guess u come to the right place.
lao fu tell u how to settle /
go independent go wild

work for wad u want
(part time )see how ur parents treat u ..... if they treat u liek dirt in future u rich u cna do the same

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Old 4th January 2010, 07:48 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Originally Posted by Yegi View Post
i guess u come to the right place.
lao fu tell u how to settle /
go independent go wild

work for wad u want
(part time )see how ur parents treat u ..... if they treat u liek dirt in future u rich u cna do the same
well, they are your parents after all.

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Old 4th January 2010, 07:54 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Wow.. your mum is.. somewhat like my mother.
Complaining about me and my sister not doing any chores. But now she got change larhs
cause i help her lol.
Maybe you should get a part-time job or something like that. Maybe sales or F&B? Prove to your mum that you are grown up already and don't be looked down by her.

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Old 4th January 2010, 07:54 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

get yourself a part time job for that extra cash to afford those expenses when going out. it expose you to more people and makes you more sociable.

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Old 4th January 2010, 07:56 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Originally Posted by Yegi View Post
i guess u come to the right place.
lao fu tell u how to settle /
go independent go wild

work for wad u want
(part time )see how ur parents treat u ..... if they treat u liek dirt in future u rich u cna do the same
wah.. ya lorhs your own mother siah. Even though how naggy she is cannot do this de.. Will kena strike by lightning de

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Old 4th January 2010, 07:59 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Originally Posted by Deathchaos View Post
wah.. ya lorhs your own mother siah. Even though how naggy she is cannot do this de.. Will kena strike by lightning de
sry misunderstand ... i nt saying my mother .... i giving him some tips.... i will nto do that cuz my parents are not even like tat larh dong mar~?

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Old 4th January 2010, 08:02 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

your mom is experiecing menopasusal.... it makes a woman's mood swings... my mom is the same thing but my dad has the secret to control her xD

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Old 4th January 2010, 08:03 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Have you tried working? Its high time you should.

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Old 4th January 2010, 08:03 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

ok. i have thought of getting a part time job. But if i go to a jc, i doubt there is even time for work.
any advice on this?
if i go to a poly, i think ill definitely get a job to earn my own extra pocket money.

thegamer1907 added 0 Minutes and 51 Seconds later...

Originally Posted by Synite View Post
your mom is experiecing menopasusal.... it makes a woman's mood swings... my mom is the same thing but my dad has the secret to control her xD
its been 5 years liek that leh brudder. got so long one meh?


Last edited by thegamer1907; 4th January 2010 at 08:06 PM. Reason: Post Bumping
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Old 4th January 2010, 08:05 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

you still waiting for results now ma, work now la. save up abit so if go JC also got some savings of your own.

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Old 4th January 2010, 08:08 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Originally Posted by whitesy View Post
you still waiting for results now ma, work now la. save up abit so if go JC also got some savings of your own.
bro, yeah, i worked til 27 december, got earn some, but i doub titll last for long
but aft that, didnt find job anymore. Plus the results will be out next week or the week after.

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Old 5th January 2010, 01:32 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

hey
im getting almost the same amount as you. or maybe even lesser. it depends.
i can say that its not enough if you want to spend 3 meals outside.
well. you can take up a part time job for now.
maybe you can find some flyer job(s) for these few weeks cause its not confirm whether you are going to a poly or a JC.
and perhaps try to save a little.
for me, i always try to save a little, but i end up spending it


Last edited by zer0nine; 5th January 2010 at 01:33 AM.
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Old 5th January 2010, 01:34 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Your mum is going through menopause, try to be understanding and behave yourself I am pretty sure many of us experience this before~

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Old 5th January 2010, 01:54 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Wah , i tot my mum worst , but ur 1 more worst...
go work dude
go find work , and work as part time
good luck dude.

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Old 5th January 2010, 01:59 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Get a part time job to break free from the restraints of ur life.

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Old 5th January 2010, 09:29 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

Your parents don't owe you anything.

You are not paying a single cent for the living expense that your family incurrs.

Stop depending on your parents, you should get a P/Time job and earn your own keep. I worked P/Time from Sec Sch onwards.

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Old 5th January 2010, 09:36 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Re: What's wrong with my mum?!?!

You have about the same scenario as I do. My mum clothes was even washed by my dad!

Maybe one of the method u can try is to tell your dad to persuade your mum? Since dad are normally the head of the family, if you can get your dad to stand by your side. I think at least can save one problem(the pocket money)

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